Laugh With Moms

It is Saturday morning and tonight can’t come quick enough.  I had to wake my cherubs up early for an 8am soccer game that got cancelled minutes after they aroused from a good nights sleep.   So we have all been up since 7:30 am (in my house that is kind of early-thank goodness!) and since the moment they were awaken they have been in each other’s business.  When you start early with that stuff you know it is going to be a long day.  Around 9am today I threw out there, “when will the babysitter be here?” which stopped my son mid-fight (he does not like to have babysitters!) and started a bunch of questions.  “Which babysitter are we having?”, “When is she coming?”  “Are you and daddy going on a date?” “What time will you be home?”…   Sometimes the babysitter can’t come soon enough on a day like today.  So you know what I did?  I put everyone into action and we cleaned this pig sty of a house with lots of complaints and groans, especially from me.  But it worked because it gave them something busy to do with their hands and they started to work together to get it done faster.  That doesn’t mean I am not looking forward to our babysitter coming as soon as possible, but it is making the wait a little bit more enjoyable.

Happy Earth Day to everyone.  As part of the festivities, my son’s school declared today “Walk to School Day”.  So in honor of the day, I packed up the three kiddos for the mile walk to school in somewhat cool and foggy conditions.  It was really invigorating for us all to be up and out that early, but we all truly enjoyed the walk.  As we were walking to school, I vowed to do it more often as the weather gets warmer.  Since we don’t live that far, it is definitely an option and allows some nice additional time with my little guy before he heads off to school for the day.  A few other parents also partook in the Walk to School day and the PTO was outside serving coffee.  So today I did my part in helping preserve our Earth for generations to come and just wanted to say Happy Earth Day to us all.  What a great place to live.

At about 8 pm on the Saturday before Easter, I got an important phone call.  Good thing he called (dripping with sarcasm).  My hubby’s business is very busy on all holidays which totally sucks for his family, most importantly me!  He is MIA for the days before the holiday and is usually closed for the actual holiday.  This year though, one of his employees offered to open on Easter for him, so now even holidays are not free of work stress.  Anyhow back to the phone call.  I answered the phone and it was my wonderful hubby calling to say goodnight to the kiddos, one of which was already heading on into REM (sleep not band).  So the other two said their goodnights with one eye on the movie they were watching.  After they were done, my hubby got on the phone with me and said “Are we all set with everything for Easter?”  I just smiled to myself thinking, boy am I glad he thought ahead!!!  Seriously 8pm on the night before Easter??  Now he is worried that we might not have everything we need for Easter?  I marvel at how his mind works…slow and last minute.  This is why my Christmas present is always cold hard cash and why I get a dozen red roses for Valentines’ Day picked up on his way home from work from the same flower shop every year.  He has no time for advanced commitment.  I wonder how he ever planned ahead enough to ask me to marry him and then even to help me plan a wedding a year in advance.  His mind doesn’t naturally work like that.  I understand it, but it still never fails to amaze me.  On the other side of that, thank goodness for those of us who do think ahead even just a little.  Because Easter Baskets would be filled with whatever is available at 11pm at CVS on the night before.  Which by the way, would totally be fine with the kiddos but there are just some things that take some advance planning.  For example, like what is for dinner/lunch on Easter and is the house clean??  As moms (and some dads) it is just part of our make up to think at least a little bit ahead, because you have to, there is so much to do that you have to at least mark some of it off your list.  Everyone has their own schedule for thinking ahead.  My schedule drives my own mother crazy.  I think ahead, but not nearly as much as she does.  So it drives her crazy if I haven’t made my flight reservations 6 months ahead.  Anyway just wanted to give a high five to all those who make those special holidays happen and make them fun and magical for those cute little cherubs.

Yesterday was one of the few nice weather days we have had in a while.  My husband and I packed up the kids and we went down to the water and flew a kite with the sun shining bright. It was a little chilly but the kids were just so happy to be outside.

At the turn of a dime the kids started to get cranky.  So we started to head towards our house and my 4 year old fell asleep.  I had what I thought was a good idea so we stopped off and walked around an outside shopping area on the water.  Once we got there we woke up my 4 year old and walked around to some of the shops.  I needed to get both of the boys new shoes and since my husband was with me, I thought it would be easier to get them both fitted at once.  They both have wide feet and I have had problems finding shoes that fit properly so we went to this one store that had a great selection of wide shoes.

The salesperson measured their feet and started to bring out shoes in their sizes.  The first pair she had my son try on were these bright orange canvas sneakers with a frog on it.  As she was putting it on his foot she tells both myself and my son that her son loves these shoes and that orange is his favorite color.  I was just trying to chase around my 1 year old and didn’t realize that while she was telling the story, my son had a huge smile on his face. We kept trying on more shoes and my son had put it in his mind that we were buying these hideous bright orange shoes.  Once I told him that we were not getting those shoes the meltdown began.  First he tried to convince me that orange was his new favorite color and then that a frog is his favorite animal and then said how they were the most comfortable shoes he ever tried on….the drama went on from there.  I had to pick him up kicking and screaming and leave the store.

After I left the store and calmed him down I thought about what harm would there be in letting him have these bright orange shoes? I then thought of the ridiculous price tag for the hideous bright orange shoes and reminded myself of why I’m the parent and he’s the child.

1)  Do not choose your dinner restaurant based on the amount of open tables on the outdoor veranda because that said restaurant may be the most expensive and finest french restaurant in Sarasota.

2) Do not expect fast and courteous service at the above mentioned restaurant just because you have three kids who are starving and must eat off the adult menu because they don’t believe in having a seperate kids menu.

3) If weight loss is what you are looking for, go on vacation with your three kids.  This may be attributed to the above mentioned restaurant (as well as all dinners during the week) when by the time your food arrives, the kids have scarfed down their hot dogs or chicken tenders (or at the above mentioned restaurant, a nice filet mignon) and have resorted to playing music with their utensils and breakable plates.

4) Just because you live in a beach town, don’t expect your kids to love the beach.  Thus requiring you to carry said children on your hip the entire time you are at the beach and thus attributing to weight loss in #3.  The feel of wet, sandy children against your body is so endearing especially when they are continually crying, rubbing their eyes increasing the amount of sunscreen getting into said eyes which is why the crying commenced in the first place.

5)  Just leave the book at home as there won’t be one single second that you can crack that open and is just added weight to your carry on.  Or should I say my children’s carry ons since there was nothing in those bags that was meant for my benefit (except to keep them thoroughly entertained for the entire flight).

6)  Just get the mini van as the money saved on the mid-size is not worth the aggravation of trying to fit  and buckle three car seats/booster seats everytime you get in and out of said car.

7)  Disney sounds great in theory and is for the most part for the morning hours of the day, but by mid afternoon you are seriously questioning your sanity and wondering if they sell mickey mouse margaritas by the gallon.  Also when you pay the $74 per ticket and you vow to stay until the fireworks, know that you will most likely leave before dinner so you can just go through the drive-thru at McDonalds to avoid one more over-priced meal while the kids are melting down.

8)  Bring your child’s birth certificate or passport when you fly so that you can prove at 5:30 am that your unticketed child is under 2 and is legal to sit on your lap for three hours in a cramped airplane.  Thus avoiding a 5:30 am phone call to your sleeping mother in law to verify your child’s birthdate for the “helpful” ticket agent.

9)  Don’t expect to pick up Twilight on DVD the first day it comes out in the retirement community you decided would be great for a family vacation.  The one “video” store within 20 miles of your condo had a great selection of new releases, from 1975.

10)  When you plan your family vacation, immediately book a long weekend with just you and your hubby to recover from that family vacation.

It is hard to write about the passing of someone you know, but doubly hard when that person passes away at the young age of 26 after a valiant fight with lung cancer.  His name is Dan Waeger and you can read his story on his and his fiancee’s blog under our blog roll or here (http://waegerwillwin.blogspot.com).  His fiancee, Meghan, is one of my very good friends from my college days and it has been amazing to watch their love story unfold over the last 2 years.  Dan passed away on Monday, March 16 with Meghan by his side after a 3 year, 10 month battle over lung cancer.  His motto was “Waeger Will Win” and indeed he did.  We all did by knowing him and watching him not only battle the cancer but develop his own foundation to help young adult cancer survivors (www.collegiatecancer.org).  He will be missed by so many, but his legacy will live on in all of us.  My thoughts and prayers are with my beautiful friend Meghan and both Dan and Meg’s family and friends  as they deal with the loss of their beloved fiancee, son, brother, brother in law, uncle, friend and hero.  Please visit their blog and website to learn more about them.

I arrived home today after a nice hour and a half heated power yoga class to find my husband and two daughters dancing away to the Wiggles.  And when I say dancing, I mean going to town with the moves.  I wanted to take a picture or grab the video camera, but I was just so happy to see this that I couldn’t tear my eyes away from them.  They were having so much fun and it made me smile to see my grown husband having as much fun as they were.  When we started talking about having kids, he was a little afraid to have girls because he knows what to do with boys, but really has no clue when it comes to girls (this girl included most times!!).   So to find them dancing away, to the Wiggles no less, just made me grin from ear to ear.  I secretly hope that I will come home someday and find that they have dressed him up with make up and hair done having a tea party, but I won’t tell him that.  In that case a picture will be a necessity.  I hope to commit the picture of them dancing to a permanent mental memory that I can access when I need a happy pick me up.  I will probably conjure up that picture when they are dancing on the their wedding day and cry like a baby to remember them so little.  So here is to letting all inhibitions fly out the window (whoa not that far) and dance your heart out to your children’s favorite musical tunes.

My husband always tells me I give our four year old too much information when I answer his questions.  He will ask “why?” and I will give what I believe is a complete answer. Then he asks another “why?” about the answer. Somehow I still feel the need to give him an honest and somewhat long answer.

Today I was driving my four year old to preschool and he tells me he doesn’t like school anymore.  I remind him that he says that he loves school every time I pick him up and that he also tells me how much fun he has. He responds with a whiny, “I don’t want to go to school”.  My nice response then starts turning not-so-nice and I finally say “you have to go to school so you can learn and one day get a job”.  He asks me what kind of job and I of course start with too much information.  I tell him that every year he will go to school and learn different things and then one day he will go to college and then he will decide what kind of job to get.  He then asks me what college is and not wanting to give out too much information, I simply respond with “it’s when you sleepover at a school and live at school”.  He then looks at me with a worried look and asks, “then I won’t live with you?”  I continue to give too much information and explain that when he gets older he won’t want to live with me. He then says, “I don’t want to go to college mommy.”

Not knowing where this is going to go next I try to put an end to it by telling him that we don’t need to talk about it now since it’s a really long time away. His response? “I want to talk about it now!”

I finally manage to change the subject and I successfully drop him off at school without incident.

I am halfway through Book #4 and am totally addicted.  I have googled everything I could about Twilight.  I have yet to see the movie, but that is because it is already out of our regular theatres and on to the secondhand theatres none of which are within a 30 minute drive.  So I will be anxiously awaiting the release of the DVD this month.  My husband asked me the other day, “what is it about those books that makes people so crazy and addicted to them?”.  I didn’t really have an answer that really summed it all up and I knew anything I said would just be filed away in his brain to use later “to bust my balls” (as these east coasters like to say).  But I tried to give him some sort of insight into the Twilight craze.  The books are so entertaining and there is always something that makes you want to keep reading to find out what happens next.  I like to read when I am walking and running on my treadmill, it makes the time go much quicker for me while engaging in torturous exercise.  Anyway the other day, I got on that treadmill to start Book #4 and 115 minutes later I knew I had to stop.  Did you know that the treadmill only goes up to 99 minutes and then starts back over at one?  Who knew, I never even get close to 45 much less 100.  The point is, I did not even realize I had been on the treadmill that long and I didn’t even want to stop, but knew that my husband was about to send out the search party.  Anyway back to what I told my wonderful hubby about the book.  I also said that each character is really interesting and each has a story that folds into the whole story.  At this point, I saw his eyes glaze over and start to tune out.  Then I said, “well there is also Edward”.  With his eyebrows arched up,  he said, “what is with this Edward guy?  I have seen him in the trailer for the movie and he is not that cute.”  I said, “I actually agree with you about that, but once you read the book (or watch the movie- I think), there is so much more to like”.  With that, he got really interested in what makes Edward so likeable and makes the girls go crazy.  I don’t really know what it is, but who isn’t a sucker for a man who loves someone so totally, completely and selflessly?  Who would do anything to protect her?  My husband gave me that little shit-eating grin he has and continued to listen to me explain.  The whole time, I know he was just cataloguing everything I have said to use at a later date.  I seriously have one of the best husbands in the world who continually keeps me laughing and really would do anything for me (although sometimes I have to hint at what that may be!).  And man does he have a good memory when he can use it to his advantage.  Just last night we were talking about the new Bachelor and who he is going to pick on the Finale (yes we do watch it from time to time) and we were talking about Jason’s (the Bachelor) qualities to which he adds “well he is no Edward”.  Sometimes he can’t even remember the kids activities that they have every week, but he can remember some guy from a book he hasn’t even read.  Let me go off on a tangent here and say it boggles my mind how much useless information is stored in the brain of my hubby.  He can remember every golf hole we played in Hawaii on our honeymoon and what he and I both scored on each hole.  I always tell him I fear that information is really taking up space in that brain of his for things that are really important.   Anyway I am trying to convince him to read it to see if he will like it, but I fear that he won’t have an open mind about it and will just agree to hate it before he reads it.  Anyhow, I have about 15 minutes before the bus comes and I am going to sneak in some time with Edward.  If you haven’t read it, do your self a favor and go get the book today.  You will love it (and Edward too!).

My sister texted me about 2 weeks ago to see if I have read the “Twilight” series.  I had heard about it at that point, but really had no interest in reading it as it had to do with teenager vampires and wasn’t really within my areas of interest.  She said she had spent the last week or so reading all four books and was obsessed with them.  My sister is 3 years older than me, has a full-time job as an emergency room physician in a very busy children’s hospital, has 4 children under the age of 8 and a full social calendar.  When does she have time to read?  She told me to read them, but warned me that “you will get nothing else done, you will neglect everything else once you start to read them”.  What?  How can a book about teenage vampires do all that?  I read the first book (400 pages) in 2 1/2 days.  I probably could have read it in a matter of hours if I didn’t have kids.  I had to reason with myself to do some housework (in small amounts) before I could sit down to read it and to put it down at night so I could actually get some sleep.  Amazing.  Last night, my husband came home at 8pm and I had to run out to get book #2.  Crazy.  My husband looked at me like I had 5 heads when I told him I had to go get the book.  Even today, I am trying to figure out some time to read.  I am officially obsessed and I am full throttle into the Twilight craze.  Does anyone want to go see the movie?  Or better yet, does anyone want to babysit my kids and clean the house, so I can read?????